My Best Friend Porn

SHE SAYS:
Sexy space women need love too. I have no idea why Ron Jeremy is pissed off at the end of the clip, but I am going to guess that it’s because he missed all of the great, sweaty fucking.

SHE SAYS:
I don’t know about you, but I would want my husband to know what my pussy tastes like. I would definitely want him to be able to decipher between various pussy juices and WOULD go to the extent of entering he and I into a contest just to prove his taste-bud love. I really think that is probably the only way for a man to prove his love. Foot massage? Gross. Home-cooked romantic dinner? Gradeshool. Goodyear blimp message? Lame. A man needs to lay back, get blindfolded, and have two to six women sit on his face while he listens to Ron Jeremy shout orders in order to make his woman the happiest woman in the world.

SHE ASKS:
I love this clip! Ron Jeremy never pulls out the goods but a bunch of girls do. This is a Ron-fucking-Jeremy piece of pornography and we never see his dick. What’s up with that? I love that he is says that he has a “stressful job.” I hear you, brother. Ron and I have a lot in common. Ronny and I are going to be BFFFs one day. You know what though? I HATE ALL OF THE FUCKING ADS IN THIS CLIP. You have to fast forward to get past ‘em. Sorry, I’d much rather not put up a clip that has lots of ads in it but this clip is too awesome to be ignored. I also love the ending…watch it to see!

SHE SAYS:
I am definitely not an expert in Ron Jeremy porn. Yes, I am aware of the fact that he has starred in many, many confusing and probably not-so-sexy or smart pornos, but still – this one is just really weird to me. I can’t get over trying to figure out the premise. Maybe it’s the fact that it starts at a club playing Madonna. Or maybe it is the dubbing. Maybe it is the hilarious dancing (please look in the background in the first scene…I literally laughed out loud!) Or, maybe it is the Arab garb. I don’t know what it is that makes it particularly really odd to me, but I do know it is not the sex. The sex looks very porny, so nothing is weird about that. It is just one of those clips where I spend a lot of time trying to figure it out to the point where there is nearly no time to actually enjoy the porn. Well, I guess all porn doesn’t have to turn you on, some are meant to make you think. OH, one more thing: although it ends in a facial (I tend to hate them) I LOVE this cumshot because it drips all over her chest. HOT!

HE SAYS:
The dancing in the background is GENIUS! You have the Fabio guy with long flowing hair dancing like a gayest man that ever gayed and what the fuck is that guy in the yellow wearing? A wetsuit? A yellow suit of armor? The rest is just confusing. Was this filmed in France? Did they fly Ron Jeremy to France for this?!? I LOVE the brunette in this scene though, she’s super sexy. Agreed on the cumshot too, I loved watching “The Hedgehog” cum all over her perfect perky tits. I ♥ porn so much!

HE SAYS:
The Girl almost has her internet figured out and should be back this week!

OK, this clip is awesome even though it also totally sucks. I love the Hedgehog’s bad jokes and creepy uncle Hawaiian shirt! You know what else I love? The fact that Ron Jeremy accidentally fishes cheese out of pizza eating Tabitha Stevens’ mouth with his dick. He immediately lets you know “it is not a genital wart.” I hate the stupid loud, slurpy blowjob so much! Worst blowjob EVER! It’s just so fucking ridiculous and it makes me hate Tabitha Stevens. Also, did I hear a HUGE fart at the 00:39 mark? I would like to think yes so don’t tell me otherwise.

Jeremy. Ron Jeremy.

If by ridiculous you mean AWESOME!
Here are 5 ridiculous (awesome) porn intros!

“I’ll skip right to the point Mr. Wad”
“Please call me Johnny”

SHE SAYS:
I totally just watched this clip and was so impressed at myself. I was so turned on! I mean, this is Ron Jeremy and there are pubes everywhere and this was probably made when I was coming out of my mother’s vagina but I don’t care. I like this kind of porn. This simply affirms that I hate most of today’s porn and absolutely love this kind of porn. I love that it ends with him jizzing ON HER CHEST and this little exchange:

Ron Jeremy: “What was it you were selling?”
Christy Canyon: “Pretty You Cosmetics.”
Ron Jeremy: “I will buy a couple.”

I ♥ pubey porn!

HE SAYS:
DAMN YOU GIRL! I had a whole post planned about Ron Jeremy and his love for this blue jogging suit. Unfortunately you have good taste in porn and ruined everything. I was also planning a post all about my love of Christy Canyon but everything is ruined. EVERYTHING! To top it off, stupid fucking PornHub updated their site and DELETED all of my favorites. I had pages and pages of saved clips to write about. This is the worst day in the history of porn!

Hey look Ron Jeremy loves this jogging suit (who cares)