My Best Friend Porn

Sorry, I love boobs. Deal with it.

It’s about time.

I was skeptical about these nude cell phone pics of Jessica Alba, but after some serious C.S.I. style investigating, I think I have cracked the case! I believe these naked photos are definitely Jessica Alba. if the mole on the chin was not enough evidence for you, I would direct your attention to the blue hat on the door knob in photo #4. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, is that not the SAME hat miss Alba was spotted wearing in photo #5? I suggest it IS the same hat and these ARE nude cell phone pictures of Jessica Alba!

Naked Jessica Alba cell phone pics!

I love this series of Alisa and Karine getting all nude and lesbian-y. This gallery includes one of the sexiest carpet munching pics I have ever seen. Simple and hot!

This awesome girl manages to look cute while giving a blowjob. I’d like to see YOU do that! Really nice blowjob pics from FTV Girls.

FTV Girls

Holy fucking shit, I love you Met-Art! Jenya D is flawless and these are the sexiest pics ever taken of you incredible nude body. I wonder how long the photographer’s boner lasted. A week? Month? Best Jenya D photos ever!

Met-Art RULES!

Alexis Silver is a terrible private detective. She should be pounding the pavement, looking for the guy who stole your credit cards but instead SHE’S getting pounded on her desk. Sadly, this otherwise great scene ends with about 1 drop of depressing cum dribbling on her amazing huge natural tits. Come on dude, get on the Peter North “ropes” diet!

Sadly, one of the greatest humans on the planet, Bob Guccione, has pasted on, but luckily for us, he left a long legacy of incredible jerk off material. If all porn except for Penthouse magazine disappeared from the earth I would have no problem finding plenty of inspiration for private self-love sessions.

Penthouse magazine has the reputation of being much raunchier than its rival Playboy but I don’t think that’s exactly accurate, at least not up until the 90s when everyone started competing with hardcore porn movies. I would argue that Penthouse was sexual while Playboy was kind of sterile. Don’t get me wrong, I jerked off to both magazines A LOT in high school but, looking back, I can now see that Playboy was selling pretty girls and Penthouse was selling SEX!

[Huge Penthouse gallery after the jump]

Penthouse was selling sex but it was more subtle than you might think. Sure, Penthouse would “show more” but Guccione’s magazine was better at the art of the tease than you might think. Penthouse knew how to present seduction in a less obvious way than Playboy and the end result was fucking sexy! They even found a way to make people masturbate to the written word thanks to the “true” stories found in “Forum.” Holy shit, Forum was as fucking hot as the pictorials!

Current pornographers should learn a thing or two from Bob Guccione. Less really can be much more when it comes to the erotic arts. Rest in peace Bob and thank you for some of the best self-induced orgasms of my life!

Why Penthouse is awesome:
- Huge fuzzy bush
- Fur Coats
- Nude girls on the beach literally fucking the ocean
- Girls only wearing the top half of bikinis
- Pool Floats!
- 1/2 open robes and shirts
- Lesbians
- Lace gloves (you know you miss them)
- TAN LINES!
- Finally, my favorite, the hand lazily touching the vagina

Our tribute to Penthouse Magazine

Bogdana B. fucking rules! Look at that petite, tight, little body, those perky tits and that perfect ass. Also, that peach looks really juicy.