Desiree Cousteau in an “old fashioned corset” and John Holmes telling her to take it off
SHE SAYS:
You like this old fashioned corset? Reminds me of bein a saloon girl or somethin. I like how John Holmes just tells her something along the lines of “Yeah, it’s sexy or whatever. Now take it off already would ya?” Who needs a corset when you have that amazing bush anyways. Oh Desiree, why didn’t you teach future generations of pornstars how to grow bushes and have sex?
HE SAYS:
This clip makes me hate contemporary porn. With most new porn, we have been robbed of the awesomely bad story lines and dialogue the vintage porn treats us too. Also, the amazing generic porno music tracks have been replaced with the sounds of girls gagging and saying “oooo yeah, fuck, fuck, shit, make me gag on your cock, oh fuck me, ooooo, fuck, shit, fuck, ooooh.” SHUT UP! I want to hear wall-to-wall funky instrumental porno jams quietly rocking the background. Desiree Cousteau is hot because she looks like a real woman, unlike most of the plastic “sluts” working today who know nothing about what it takes to be sexy. This clip has all the basic elements still used today, but it’s so much better because it it’s toned down and isn’t violent, degrading and gimmicky like most new porn. I miss porn from the 70s and early 80s so much, it was definitely the golden era.
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Wow! I always loved Desiree Cousteau. She was hot but still believable hot. Like maybe I’d see her on the street or something. At the same time I always hated John Holmes. He always seemed like such an asshole and he had a freakish dick. He seemed like such an asshole I mean he kind of took it for granted that he was fucking hot girls by the boatload. Plus there’s the whole Wonderland murders and pimping out your wife thing. You know, now that I think about he’s pretty much responsible for ruining porn and giving it a bad name.
Yeah John Holmes was a creep. I hate that his dick never fully gets hard. He probably does not have enough blood in his body. There’s something unnerving about seeing that giant, floppy whale dick.
Well, that’s all he has. He’s butt-ugly. He just decided to use what he has, and I don’t blame him for that. And I have to admit, I kinda wonder what a giant floppy whale dick would taste like. Not necessarily what it would feel like, because I was in a relationship with a whale a few years ago. The problem is he never wanted blow jobs. Who doesn’t want blow jobs? Who would deny that? Lesson learned? Don’t date a whale, under any circumstances. Do you hear me ladies? DON’T DATE A WHALE!