Jan 30 2009
HE SAYS:
I was trying to think of some smart ass joke to make about this clip but I really can’t think of anything. I really like this clip. My only complaint is the camera strap in the frame at the end. I don’t know why but that really bugs me! I love this girl and I love her body. OK, I just watched it again to see if I was missing anything but no, this is just some great amateur porn.
Jan 30 2009
SHE SAYS:
Well, make that the first 15 minutes. It is all about the tease in this clip. It drives me absolutely, positively insane! I love this clip more than any other clip I have found. That girl receiving this amazing massage is so incredibly sexy. Watching someone get turned on as much as this girl does is almost enough to give me an orgasm. I am seriously getting incredibly turned on AGAIN while typing this. I seriously think that all porn should be like this clip. I love watching real people have real orgasms. I ♥ porn!
HE SAYS:
Agreed, this is one of my all-time favorite porn scenes too. The Girl is exactly right, the tease in the beginning is incredible. I was practically biting my nails waiting for her to finally remove that bra and touch those breasts! I think the blonde is Bree Olson. This is one of the most boner-inducing lesbian scenes ever!
Update: Pornhub changed the clip so here’s a link to it. Thanks Pornhub.
Jan 29 2009
HE SAYS:
I have to agree with this German (?) dude, this girl does look like Cameron Diaz. In fact I would say she is even cuter than her. I wonder if Cameron gives such loud blowjobs? AS ALWAYS the guy shooting this clip refuses to shut the fucking fuck up and forces me to turn the sound off. This guy sucks major ass and he’s wrecking my Cameron Diaz blowjob fantasy!
Jan 29 2009
SHE SAYS:
Watch Muffy as she licks nipples. Watch as they put down computer geeks and tell them to “get a life.” Watch as they kill each other by giving each other orgasms. Listen to the AWESOME sound effects. Embarrassingly, I masturbated to this. Sorry everybody. I wish Facebook wasn’t so influential in my life. Well, without it I would not have been as inspired to do the vampire porn search, and without it I would have not found this gem of a clip. Right?
Jan 29 2009
Dear Laura,
First let me say that I have a little bit of a crush on you. I know it’s silly and I don’t want to embarrass you but it’s true. I first saw you in “Sex, Lies and Videotape” when I was just a young pervert and I have to tell you I was a little turned on by you. I loved your scratchy voice and that cute gap in your teeth. Now, I should also admit that I lost touch with your career after “Sex, Lies and Videotape” but please understand it was only because I went to college and things got a little out of control. I am truly sorry and I hope the early 90′s treated you well.
It was not until I saw you again in the Stephen King mini series “The Stand” that I realized I still had feelings for you. It was also at this time that I realized you had tremendously huge tits. I believe you were fucking the Devil, does that sound right? Anyway, I remember your enormous bra being stretched to its limit while trying to hold back your giant dairy pillows. Our romance was back on!
I spent the next 3 years hoping and praying that you would wise up and do a nude scene. It just seemed wrong that you would not share your milk jugs with the world. I waited and waited but… nothing.
In 1997 you began your run as the bleeding heart liberal with ample sweater meat on “Just Shoot Me” with co-star David Spade. Once again you and I picked up just where we left off. As perfect and soft as your honkers looked in those tight sweaters I was still waiting for you to take off your over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder and let the world share in God’s perfect creations. But still, NOTHING!
Laura, I just don’t understand it. You have to dig deep to find an actress without at least one topless scene or a quick nipple flash on their resume. I am begging you to release your meat pillows into the wild before it is too late! Don’t make the same mistake Kathy Bates did and get nude when you are past your prime. Did Kathy Bates have a prime? Anyway, currently you are 47 years old and appear to be holding up nicely, but based on my calculations you have a mere 2 years left to show off your beautiful milkmelons.
Listen to me, it is time to get naked on film. I implore you! Time is of the essence so please do not hesitate for even one more day. When you finish reading this I command you to call your agent and say, “Jimmy, let the world know Laura San Giacomo wants to get naked in a movie and she wants to do it now!” Jimmy will play it cool and say things like, “Hmmmm, are you sure Laura?” but secretly he will be high-fiving his boner because guess what, Jimmy wants to see your hooters too. WE ALL DO!
Now throw your laptop across the room, pick up that God damn phone and show the world your huge bazooms before it’s too late!
Sincerely,
The Guy
Jan 29 2009
Amanda is a free spirit and a tree-huger, literally. She kind of has an Uma Thurman thing going don’t you think? I love Amanda’s boobs and I love me for sharing them with you. I AM AWESOME!
Jan 28 2009
Normally you might find Gianna Michaels with various cocks in various holes but here she is looking sexy and curvy stripping out of her lingerie. So here you go, please enjoy Gianna and her huge natural boobs.
Jan 28 2009
SHE SAYS:
I know this is fake but it is still entertaining to watch. I love that the guy doing the voice over says, “Oh, help me Lord Jesus!” I wonder what they make the fake cum out of…do you think it is a confectioner’s sugar concoction? Possibly evaporated milk, slightly watered down…or maybe it is sweetened condensed milk! God, I love sweetened condensed milk – almost as much as I like the taste of cum. Maybe it is an actual gallon of real cum. Or a mixture of sweetened condensed milk AND cum! I ♥ cum!
HE SAYS:
The first time I saw one of these fake giant cumshots was when I was just learning to be a pervert. I was probably around 15 years old and I got my hands on a porn compilation (on VHS – shut up!) and there was one of these endless facials on it. Of course as a teen, it took me about 10 views (yeah, I watched that tape a lot) before I realized it was fake. It was the first time I felt betrayed by my new friend porn.
